It’s been a while since I’ve blogged but there is something I have to get off my chest. Kanye West…it seems we can’t go a day without Kanye being in the news for the latest outlandish action he performed or comment that he said. While I do agree that some of his actions are farfetched, due to certain ailments I’ve had since childhood, I somewhat understand where the man is coming from. Though misdiagnosed from 15 to 41, I have bipolar disorder just as Kanye disclosed in 2019. If you don’t know what living with bipolar is like…you just don’t know. But here is a crash course:
Symptoms can last over a few weeks, months, or even years. The symptoms vary during the manic and depressive phase. And without any symptoms, in between episodes of mania and depression.
The manic phase is characterized by:
- Extreme happiness, hopefulness, and excitement
- Irritability, anger, fits of rage and hostile behavior
- Restlessness
- Agitation
- Rapid speech
- Poor concentration and judgment
- Increased energy
- Less need for sleep
- Unusually high sex drive
- Setting unrealistic goals
- Paranoia
The depressive phase may include:
- Sadness and crying
- Feelings of hopelessness, worthlessness, and guilt
- Loss of energy
- Loss of interest or pleasure in everyday activities
- Trouble concentrating and making decisions
- Irritability
- Need for more sleep or sleeplessness
- Change in appetite
- Weight loss/gain
- Suicidal thoughts and attempts at suicide
If timely treatment is not provided, bipolar disorder could lead to:
- Damaged and strained relationships, in and outside the home
- Poor performance at school or work
- Alcohol and drug abuse
- Financial difficulties
- Suicidal thoughts and attempts
Prior to being diagnosed and properly medicated, I was known for fits of rage, extreme ups and downs and loud spontaneous outbursts. I destroyed my family, burnt every bridge I crossed and even spit in face of my father and brother. I was a nightmare. Sound familiar? Kanye acted out due to his undiagnosed disorder. I don’t know if he has a treatment regimen, but he continues to act out possibly due to being unmedicated.
For me…most importantly, I stay sober. Like in most cases, alcohol only makes things worse. Secondly, medication works. I know there is a stigma to taking meds, but I would not be here without them. Yes, I can still be temperamental at times, but the symptoms have subsided tremendously. And lastly, I have an incredible support system including a spouse who stays vigilant to any changes in mood and agitation. She tracks my meds, notices inconsistencies and is not afraid to challenges my mood when necessary.
There are so many variables that play into a sane bipolar patient. But the most important is willingness. A person with bipolar disorder must be willing to put in the work. I’m mostly stable today because I’m dedicated to staying as sane as possible. I put in the work, and I stay close to those who love and support me.
I question Kanye’s treatment regiment, if he has one at all. And what for those he keeps around him? Do they support him or enable his actions? Kanye will only get better if he commits to a clean lifestyle and stay away from actions that make matters worse.
My point is to not judge what you don’t know. Yes, Kanye’s actions might seem outlandish and uncontrolled but, given his condition, would you act any different?
SAS 